Naples v Liverpool Match Thread

Before I start the match thread, I feel that I need to respond to some anonymous and scurrilous claims  in the gutter press that my match threads are full of "fake news" I can only say that all my facts have been thoroughly checked and verified by Russia Today and if these rumours persist, I will be forced to put the matter in the grasping hands of my lawyers Cockwater, Gash and Bumhead.

Now we go to Naples to take on Napoli in our second match of the CL group stage. Naples is always associated with the phrase " See Naples and die". Which makes no sense at all. Unfortunately, this is a classic example of how, since the advent of social media, an inaccurate and incomplete quote can come to be accepted as fact. The correct quote actually starts "See Naples and I ......" and then goes on  ".......think there is a very good chance you will come away with a famous victory and three valuable points to put you in charge at the top of the group". Now, I am sure you will agree, when  written out in full and put into its true historical context, it makes much more sense.

I have tried to dig up some dirt on Napoli but cannot find any evidence of match fixing, FFP breaches, bribery or corruption. I did see rumours of a case against the club some years back but strangely despite my best efforts I can find no trace whatsoever of any witnesses, police investigators, prosecutors, the Judge or indeed jury members............. The moral of this story, I suppose, is if you fancy a nice mini-break away in an English Cathedral City contact the GRU but if you want a job done properly it's the Mafia you need.

There has been a long running argument between the Neopolitans and the French as to who was responsible for spreading syphilis across Europe. It has been variously called "the French disease" or  simply referred to as "Naples". The French claim it came from the Neopolitans  and the Neopolitans that it came from French Sailors. The matter has now been thrown into further confusion by a claim from Harry Kane, which has been accepted by the FA, that it actually came off his shirt.......

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Prediction League Bonus:
1. LFC Result (Win, Draw or Loss) for 1 point
2. Exact Score (must get result correct to be eligible) for 1 point
3. First goal scorer (either team) for 1 point
4. Most completed passes by an LFC player for 1 point
5. The Beeb MOTM for 1 point
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